As I thought about it there were some significant similarities between Jake's story and background, his childhood, and Beau's. They didn't know each other, had never met before the night we found Beau in our driveway, and yet...both had drunks for fathers, and missing mothers although for different reasons.
One ran off and the other died. But both were gone. Absent to their children.
That was indisputable.
Boys need their mothers, and I am sure girls do too...but never having been one nor having a sister I can only assume. The absence of the mother in each boys case plus having an abusive or remote father had taken its toll. I knew rather quickly that Jake had been starved for love, and I was pretty sure it would turn out that Beau was too. Understandable...
Two lost souls, and both on my doorstep within a relatively short period of time. What was I to make of that? I didn't know...nor did it look like I was going to be given time to consult with my deeper innards seeking the answer if indeed there was one. Maybe sometimes things just happen or maybe they happen by destiny. Happen for a reason...but was that the case here? I didn't know and I already knew that perhaps I never would.
Maybe Jake just needed SOMEBODY, and I was the one who showed up...but, I was too far gone to be able to pull back now. Time would tell, I told myself, and yes it usually does. Maybe it was actually ME who needed someone.
"OH SHUT THE FUCK UP," I told myself and for once I obeyed.
SHIT HAPPENS, or so the bumper sticker goes...and so it does.
_________________________________________________________
Beau was obviously exhausted, and being now full of food Jake and I decided it was time to get him up to bed and so we did and as soon as we got him settled in one of the guest rooms Beau conked out and then we quickly got to our room and hit the sheets ourselves. Snuggled and cozy, and I think suddenly even closer than we had been. Something happened tonight beyond Beau, or maybe because of his arrival. Jake seemed a bit unsettled and maybe needing reassurance. So, I did my best...and it was good. Really good.
__________________________________________________________
The next morning came and I slipped out of bed early leaving Jake to sleep a bit longer...and as I passed the bedroom where Beau was, I could hear him softly snoring. Almost purring, I thought, and I knew that that was a first in a very very long time.
I made my way to the stairs as quietly as I could and got down them and into the kitchen pretty smoothly. Within a few minutes I had the eggs, english muffins, pancake mix and sausage patties ready to go and the pans heating. Then I heard...
"Starting without me?"
I turned and Jake was standing in the doorway and smiling.
"Yep. Thought I would."
"Need help?"
"Always, and he moved over to me and kissed me deeply.
Which is definitely the kind of help I love, and I told him so, laughing to myself as I did so.
Couple minutes later, a still sleepy and pretty bedraggled Beau made his appearance and Jake ushered him over to the breakfast table with a cup of coffee, a glass of orange juice, and then a couple slices of toast while I finished up making breakfast.
We ate pretty quietly. Seemed to me we were all kinda lost in our own thoughts and certainly tired.
I couldn't help but wonder what in the hell we were going to do with him, Beau that is. I looked over at him. He looked SO young and so fragile.
Could Jake and I care for him? Who was he? Where had he come from?
I had a ton of questions and no answers, and I had learned with Jake that sometimes these things take time to reveal themselves. It wasn't that Jake tried to keep things from me or deliberately withheld things. He could only say so much at a time because it was so painful. I had a hunch it would be the same with Beau, but we didn't have the time. We were headed to New York in a few days and then on to first London and then Europe for the summer.
Ahhh, bumming around Europe for 2 1/2 months.
Ahhhhh. Silly me...thinking that that was still gonna happen.
SIGH.
________________________________________________________
We finished up eating and then got busy clearing the table and cleaning up.
I then started the dishes while Jake got Beau into one of the big overstuffed chairs in the Great Room, and I almost laughed when I finished the dishes and went to check on them only to find both of them asleep in their chairs. They looked almost as if Tinkerbell had sprinkled Pixie dust on them and poof. I leaned down and kissed Beau gently on the forehead, he didn't even stir, and then slipped in beside Jake in his chair. I love these chairs and the matching couches. So comfy. You sink into them, and the chairs are so wide I swear you could get an entire hockey team in them. I cuddled and snuggled tight with my head resting on Jake's shoulder. He didn't stir either.
Normally I would have been surprised at Jake back asleep so soon, but
yesterday had been hectic. Shopping and last-minute school stuff, and then the pre-commencement with Jake doing the final touches on his speech as Valedictorian...and I just knew he would deliver a rousing speech to thunderous applause.
Of course, I never said a word to anyone that I was the one who had written it, but after all I AM a writer...and the next night when he said the words so passionately...as far as I was concerned HE was the author.
Then of course, dinner at the country club afterward, and after driving home we had found Beau. Quite the day.
CLICK HERE FOR CHAPTER X
One ran off and the other died. But both were gone. Absent to their children.
That was indisputable.
Boys need their mothers, and I am sure girls do too...but never having been one nor having a sister I can only assume. The absence of the mother in each boys case plus having an abusive or remote father had taken its toll. I knew rather quickly that Jake had been starved for love, and I was pretty sure it would turn out that Beau was too. Understandable...
Two lost souls, and both on my doorstep within a relatively short period of time. What was I to make of that? I didn't know...nor did it look like I was going to be given time to consult with my deeper innards seeking the answer if indeed there was one. Maybe sometimes things just happen or maybe they happen by destiny. Happen for a reason...but was that the case here? I didn't know and I already knew that perhaps I never would.
Maybe Jake just needed SOMEBODY, and I was the one who showed up...but, I was too far gone to be able to pull back now. Time would tell, I told myself, and yes it usually does. Maybe it was actually ME who needed someone.
"OH SHUT THE FUCK UP," I told myself and for once I obeyed.
SHIT HAPPENS, or so the bumper sticker goes...and so it does.
_________________________________________________________
Beau was obviously exhausted, and being now full of food Jake and I decided it was time to get him up to bed and so we did and as soon as we got him settled in one of the guest rooms Beau conked out and then we quickly got to our room and hit the sheets ourselves. Snuggled and cozy, and I think suddenly even closer than we had been. Something happened tonight beyond Beau, or maybe because of his arrival. Jake seemed a bit unsettled and maybe needing reassurance. So, I did my best...and it was good. Really good.
__________________________________________________________
The next morning came and I slipped out of bed early leaving Jake to sleep a bit longer...and as I passed the bedroom where Beau was, I could hear him softly snoring. Almost purring, I thought, and I knew that that was a first in a very very long time.
I made my way to the stairs as quietly as I could and got down them and into the kitchen pretty smoothly. Within a few minutes I had the eggs, english muffins, pancake mix and sausage patties ready to go and the pans heating. Then I heard...
"Starting without me?"
I turned and Jake was standing in the doorway and smiling.
"Yep. Thought I would."
"Need help?"
"Always, and he moved over to me and kissed me deeply.
Which is definitely the kind of help I love, and I told him so, laughing to myself as I did so.
Couple minutes later, a still sleepy and pretty bedraggled Beau made his appearance and Jake ushered him over to the breakfast table with a cup of coffee, a glass of orange juice, and then a couple slices of toast while I finished up making breakfast.
We ate pretty quietly. Seemed to me we were all kinda lost in our own thoughts and certainly tired.
I couldn't help but wonder what in the hell we were going to do with him, Beau that is. I looked over at him. He looked SO young and so fragile.
Could Jake and I care for him? Who was he? Where had he come from?
I had a ton of questions and no answers, and I had learned with Jake that sometimes these things take time to reveal themselves. It wasn't that Jake tried to keep things from me or deliberately withheld things. He could only say so much at a time because it was so painful. I had a hunch it would be the same with Beau, but we didn't have the time. We were headed to New York in a few days and then on to first London and then Europe for the summer.
Ahhh, bumming around Europe for 2 1/2 months.
Ahhhhh. Silly me...thinking that that was still gonna happen.
SIGH.
________________________________________________________
We finished up eating and then got busy clearing the table and cleaning up.
I then started the dishes while Jake got Beau into one of the big overstuffed chairs in the Great Room, and I almost laughed when I finished the dishes and went to check on them only to find both of them asleep in their chairs. They looked almost as if Tinkerbell had sprinkled Pixie dust on them and poof. I leaned down and kissed Beau gently on the forehead, he didn't even stir, and then slipped in beside Jake in his chair. I love these chairs and the matching couches. So comfy. You sink into them, and the chairs are so wide I swear you could get an entire hockey team in them. I cuddled and snuggled tight with my head resting on Jake's shoulder. He didn't stir either.
Normally I would have been surprised at Jake back asleep so soon, but
yesterday had been hectic. Shopping and last-minute school stuff, and then the pre-commencement with Jake doing the final touches on his speech as Valedictorian...and I just knew he would deliver a rousing speech to thunderous applause.
Of course, I never said a word to anyone that I was the one who had written it, but after all I AM a writer...and the next night when he said the words so passionately...as far as I was concerned HE was the author.
Then of course, dinner at the country club afterward, and after driving home we had found Beau. Quite the day.
CLICK HERE FOR CHAPTER X
No comments:
Post a Comment